


enough tin foil for the apocalypse

by jaerie



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alien/Human Relationships, Aliens, M/M, Other, References to Aliens, That's um... pretty much it, kind of?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-15
Updated: 2019-07-15
Packaged: 2020-06-29 03:21:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,261
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19821496
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jaerie/pseuds/jaerie
Summary: Louis comes home to a tin foil covered house and his boyfriend's secrets





	enough tin foil for the apocalypse

The world was changing and Louis felt like he could hardly keep up with the news. 

The ship had been spotted less than a week before. Showing up on some of NASA’s technology, the first images of a spaceship from another place or time parked just outside earth’s atmosphere and everyone held their breath. The first contact had been diplomatic but not everyone was as optimistic. Many argued that it was a rouse so they could catch the people of earth off guard with their attack. 

Louis wasn’t quite sure what to believe. There were so many false or exaggerated posts flying around that it was difficult to form his own objective opinion about it. He just hoped that they wouldn’t meet a catastrophic death Independence Day style. 

So the world was changing yet everyday life kept on going. Louis had been out of town on assignment when everything had happened and had only just arrived back home. He opened the automatic garage door and then had to slam on his breaks before driving into the massive pallet of something sitting where his car usually did. He squinted and thought it looked like a four by four foot square of tin foil boxes stacked taller than himself. 

He killed the engine and climbed out of the car. Harry had always been a little over the top, a little quirky, but buying in bulk for the apocalypse didn’t seem like him. Also food seemed like the priority for something like that. 

But there in the middle of his garage was not one, but two pallets of Reynolds Wrap aluminum foil. One was still piled tall and wrapped in the clingwrap it had been shipped in and the other was already half gone. The sight was baffling. 

What the hell was Harry doing with a two-lifetime supply of tin foil?? 

He walked into the house and was met by piles of empty tin foil boxes littering every space. 

“Harry?” he called out hesitantly. 

There was no response so he proceeded cautiously. He jumped when he heard a sound from above and ducked as if the ceiling was about to cave in on him. He looked up to see it intact. It wasn’t Christmas so he definitely wasn’t expecting Santa to make an unexpected visit. 

Walking out onto the back deck, he was immediately blinded by the sharp reflection of the sun aimed right at his face. 

“What the fuck?” he squinted and spun around. Every part of the house facing their backyard save for the sliding glass doors was meticulously covered with tin foil. It was done with such perfection that he would have thought it a professional job if there was an actual profession that did such a thing. Each row of siding, each door and window frame-- everything. 

He squinted and looked up against the glare to see that every shingle had been covered as well and there was Harry right in the middle of it with a pyramid of tin foil boxes piled at his side. 

“Harold? What the fuck are you doing?” Louis called as he shielded his eyes. 

“Covering the house in aluminum foil.” 

“Obviously I can see that. But  _ why  _ are you making the house into a giant baked potato??” 

“So that they can’t see in and find us.” 

It was only then that Louis realized Harry was wearing a ridiculous looking tin foil helmet that came down to his browline. 

“So  _ who _ can’t see in and find us??”

“The ship. Aluminum is an element that doesn’t exist on their planet. Their instruments can’t penetrate it.”

It sounded logical enough if it wasn’t completely insane. This was real life, not a scifi film. 

“Did you join a cult while I was gone?” Louis called up. 

“Just... Just trust me, okay? I’ll explain but I really have to get this done first. It took a couple days for the foil to come in so I’ve lost a lot of time.” 

“Did you start taking drugs while I was gone? Meth? PCP? Bath salts?”

“Louiiieeeee,” Harry whined from the roof. “Stoppppp. I swear I’ll tell you when I’m done, okay?” 

Louis shook his head and watched for a few more minutes before the bright reflection was starting to blind him. He was probably ten shades darker already from the UV exposure if he wasn’t completely sunburned. 

The summer sun had set by the time Harry finally made his way inside. Louis was lounging on the couch with a beer watching the twenty-four hour news coverage of the spaceship. He couldn’t help it. It was fascinating. 

“So. You gonna tell me why you decided to dress up like the tin man?” Louis asked. 

Harry frowned and pulled off the tin foil helmet and crumpled it up in his hands. 

“Can’t you ever take anything I say seriously?” He asked incredulously. 

“I do. But honestly? You make it difficult when you’re acting out a deleted scene from Signs on the roof.” 

“This is fucking serious!” Harry threw his hands up and Louis had never heard Harry raise his voice. Their arguments were always subtle and passive aggressive. They never shouted at each other. Louis froze with his beer halfway to his mouth. 

“I’m not really from Cleveland.” 

“Well I already figured that,” Louis finished taking his swig of beer and rested it on his thigh. Harry had always been a unique character. He always seemed reluctant to talk about his past so honestly Louis had come to the conclusion that he’d grown up in a religious cult somewhere and broke free to start a new life. 

“I’m from a different galaxy.” 

“Because that ass is out of this world,” Louis smirks, using one of Harry’s own lame jokes back at him. 

“Can you stop for even one minute!??” 

Louis dropped the smile immediately. He’d never seen Harry so upset. 

“I ran away from home and ended up here and now they’re here looking for me and all you can do is make fucking jokes!” 

“What’s the name of your planet?” Louis quizzes him to see if he’s being put on. 

“It doesn’t have a name in any human language. I think it’s in the galaxy your scientists call the Sombrero Galaxy but it’s hard to tell because their research is so general.” 

“Okay now you’re really joking. You expect me to believe there is a thing called the Sombrero galaxy??” 

“There is! Look it up!!” Harry insisted. 

Louis pulled his phone out while rolling his eyes and then stops when he sees all the search returns for Sombrero Galaxy. 

“So how do I know you’re not just making all this up?” 

“I’d show you but it takes a lot of energy to phase and I also don’t want to bring attention to this part of the country.” 

“So I’m just supposed to take your word for it?” 

Harry rolled his eyes and then closed them tight. When he opens them again Louis jumps back with a girlish scream. His normally mossy green irises had transformed into a metallic green like the back of some weird bug. It was the shock of it that frightened him, not so much how they looked after he started to get used to it. 

Just as quickly Harry blinked and brought them back to normal but Louis stayed frozen with his jaw slack. 

“Can you just trust me on this?” Harry pleaded, “I don’t want to go back and fight in the wars.” 

“So what do we do?” Louis asked, his voice weak. 

“We just wait.” 

**Author's Note:**

> [here's the fic post](https://jaerie.tumblr.com/post/186340025372/enough-tin-foil-for-the-apocalypse-ga-1k-by)


End file.
